Life Through My Eyes

Are race definitions logical, or is it merely endorsed by the ruling classes in order to oppress and use as a form of social control?

2011-07-01T17:10:00.000-07:00

This is something that I have been thinking about for a while lately. In this current society (and a lot in the past), race is always exaggerated. I am even aware that institutions get extra funding for taking ethnic minorities either in the workplace or in educational institutions.

Everytime a famous mixed race couple – that is the main reason that they get so much attention, because of their races combining.

So, is race logical? To take a real Marxist view, I believe that race was (and still is) initiated by the upper classes in order to oppress and a major source of social control. That’s why, I think, that so much of a deal is made out of race all the time, and why it’s such a heated subject.

I think that it is unnecessary to have to say stuff like ‘Black is beautiful,’ and all that jazz, cos quite frankly, you shouldn’t have to keep convincing yourself that your race is beautiful. You have beauty in every race.

I understand the concept, however. I get that through discrimination and slavery, black people were made to feel unattractive and unworthy, therefore, sayings like that is helpful. But why the need, especially in our modern world, which is meant to be fair and equal?

If I became famous, I don’t want to be famous just because I’m black, I want to be successful because of my personality and my attitude. My race shouldn’t define me – sure, it’s part of my identity but it doesn’t completely make up my life. Ha, I eat – I’m black, I sleep – I’m black, wtf?

Furthermore, all race definitions seems to have done and continue to do is to just divide people. I don’t want to sound terribly clichéd, but technically, we are all the f**king same to be honest. I get my period like a white and Asian girl does. SHOCK HORROR!

Was Cameron right to attack ‘state multiculturalism’?

2011-05-20T01:13:00.000-07:00

http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2008/feb/26/conservatives.race

David Cameron, back in 2008 complained in the aforementioned article about what he calls ‘state multiculturalism.’ He mentioned that "the idea that we should respect different cultures within Britain to the point of allowing them – indeed encouraging them – to live separate lives, apart from each other and apart from the mainstream."

I do think this is true. In my old school, we had an influx of students from Turkey. Instead of being encouraged to learn English though and do ESOL classes, they didn’t learn to improve the little English that they knew and instead just hung out with their fellow Turkish students and didn’t do well.

In the school which my younger brother is being forced by Haringey Council (grr) to go to, most of the students first language isn’t even English, which is why the school is so poor.

I’m not against multiculturalism, but I’m against ignorance. Just like when stupid people ask dumb questions like ‘Do you wash your hair?’ (When I had braids in). Indeed we are living in an increasingly multicultural society, however, instead of only sticking with our own kind, we should take the time to embrace other cultures and races. ALSO we should particularly bear in mind, the ‘original’ culture where we are residing, the BRITISH one. Which I think is what Cameron had mainly in mind. It’s only fair to pay respects to your host country, isn’t it?

I do, in part, agree with him. There are certain cultures which tend to keep to themselves, which I think it’s wrong. This is going to sound so patriotic of me, but I think if you aren’t going to mix, you may as well go back to your own country. I say the same thing about people who don’t want their children to mix with other cultures – if you don’t like it, why are you here?

I’m not saying people should reject their culture, I’m not saying that at all. I just believe that people need to open their minds and stop being so narrow minded. This includes Cameron too, who, to be honest, doesn’t know what it’s like to be from a minority background, at all. He certainly isn’t from an area where there would have been a lot of people from minority backgrounds either. From no fault of his own, however, I do believe that he should take the time out to indulge himself with us, since he is the Prime Minister. The same goes for British people too. Everyone, basically.

Are the Government right to get rid of EMA?

2011-05-13T14:14:00.000-07:00

I know they’re trying to save money and everything. I just want to know what people think of this?

I get EMA, but I admit I haven’t been getting it lately because I haven’t been going into school as religiously as I should. I don’t really mind though, because I’ve also been working so I have money.

I personally am in two mindsets about it. I believe that it’s useful, especially for those who are from low-income families as it does help, however I also think that it was a huge bribery from Labour to get young people to pursue higher education, just like those free London Oyster cards and student discounts, etc, etc.

I did like getting it though (of course I did); that extra £30 in my bank account weekly was very beneficial – however, I believe that if anything it encouraged me just to be a bit more sly about my skiving, rather than actually force myself to go to all my lessons.

I also believe that instead of segregating the low-income young people from the high-income people, as the Government LOVE to do, everybody should get EMA. In Sweden, all young people that stay in higher education get money from the Swedish government. But to be fair, the population of Sweden is the population of London, LOL.

So arguably, either everyone should get it, or no one should get it at all.

The EMA thing, yes it was useful to us, but it just emphasised the difference between the poor and the rich to be honest. In my school, they did it by paper, so after each lesson I had to go up to the teacher and get it signed. It used to be quite embarrassing, especially as my school is in quite a middle-class area; so there are few people that actually get EMA. In my English class I used to be the only one that would go up with my green form, and even though I probably shouldn't have, I felt my face burning like I was a primary school kid yet again.

But oh well, it's going now, whether you like it or not.

A Royal Wedding Special – A week late I know ;)

2011-05-06T08:51:00.000-07:00

Can everyone just shut up about it? It was just two people getting married, as if that’s never happened before.

I understand that it’s important, but it is overrated in my opinion. I worked there last week in Hyde Park (I thought that it would be smart to make money off it, since it has taken a lot of taxpayer’s money). I just thought it was ridiculous how over 100,000 people came to watch a wedding on big screens when they could have sat at home comfortable and watched it on their telly.

Not to mention the people that dressed up in wedding gowns and bought shirts, which stated ‘WILLIAM AND KATE,’ are people being actually serious? The couple cannot see you, they don’t know you, and they certainly haven’t thanked you. You sure as hell have given them a large amount of wedding-gift money though, for people you’ve never met and very likely never will. Therefore, chill. Thank you.

This really leads on to what I think about the Royal Family as a whole. I identify as British, and I am proud, but I don’t understand. They don’t rule, so why are they there. I recognise that they are a historical ruling family, but they don’t have the same role as kings and queens did back in the day. Parliament virtually rule; all the monarch does is just approve laws.

It’s not their fault; they didn’t ask to be born into the family (I certainly would have). And when you think about it, if you were them, you wouldn’t change a thing. I mean, I’m glad that I recognise the value of a pound, but it would be great to be rich.

But I believe if they are to have a purpose, and to be worth taxpayer’s money, then they should at least rule a lot more than they actually do. If they are just going to carry on how they are, then they should be removed, and we should just become a Republic. I recognise that they bring a lot of tourism (more money, everything always boils down to money), but shouldn’t their legacy enough be a tourist attraction. It’s not as if tourists even see them either?

Though, even though I hate to admit it, Kate looked beautiful, and I wish Diana could have been there to see her son get married. However, why is he balding? He's only 28?

Why do some girls bring things on themselves?

2011-04-29T23:00:00.000-07:00

It’s something that has been annoying me for a while. I know of a girl that got raped near where I live the other day, and she was notorious for wearing short, short skirts and revealing tops as well as being blonde and blue-eyed. I’m not saying at all that she deserved what happened to her, it was awful, but when women go around and wear certain things, it’s almost shouting at a dirty, disgusting man to approach you.

I see girls when I’m coming back from clubs, drunk and completely off their faces, can barely stand, walking in heels that they can’t even walk in, and I am scared for them. It’s not like they’re getting a safe cab home either, a lot of the time they’re getting on a night bus full of strange men. I was out with my mates this one time, and one of them got really drunk, and she was virtually falling all over the place. She tripped and fell on the stairs outside McDonalds in a drunken trance, and even though it was funny, it was completely disgusting how dirty men started stopping and turning around looking at her in a leering manner. Completely gross.

It’s horrible to think what those men would have done to her if we weren’t there. The worst thing and the horrible irony is that if they had raped her or if she ‘wanted’ to have sex with them, she wouldn’t even have her bearings to remember the next day what happened, or whether or not the guy had used protection.

I’m not going to lie; I have been drunk a few times. The one time however, I was so out of it I vomited everywhere and got my phone stolen right out of my hands, since I had passed out. The feeling of being tipsy and drunk is quite fun at first, but you have to be responsible. If you know that you’re going to a public place where you only know a handful of people, don’t be dumb enough to get wasted especially as you know that you have to make your own way home via public transport and you could potentially get jacked or even worse, attacked. I know a woman who was so off her face that someone stole her credit card and cleaned out her entire bank account as they had observed her PIN code as she was keying it in to purchase more alcohol.

Not to leave men out of the lurch at all, by the way. Why these sick bastards can leer and perv over someone who is completely out of it is completely disgusting, and they deserve to be castrated. But girls really need to THINK before they put on clothes and go out of their house.

Is Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’ really that bad?

2011-04-22T03:37:00.000-07:00

The song is bad, no lie. But I personally think that people are hyping it too much. It is annoyingly addictive, but that just makes it a guilty pleasure for people in my book. There are many, many bad songs. It’s not like she’s the first person to sing a bad song. She didn’t even write it!

I just can’t get over the fact that people are e-mailing and sending her death threats – she’s thirteen years old for goodness sake. If someone were going to pay me a grand to sing a shitty song which could gain even more revenue, I would do it!

The bigger irony is that she is making so much money off these haters, even if mildly distressed by them. She’s THIRTEEN for the love of God, leave her alone. A f***ing child.

There’s a simple resolution if you don’t like the song. Don’t listen to it! Gosh.

The British Government has to stop exploiting the poor

2011-03-04T07:38:00.000-08:00

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1354726/Nick-Clegg-orders-universities-lower-entrance-requirements-poor-students.html

This article really angered me, because I feel that one, Nick Clegg was the one who PROMISED that he would not raise tuition fees for university - but never trust the government. Now he’s talking about how really good universities should lower their entrance requirements. Not that anyone really listens to him anyway, why should they, but I think it is stupid for him as a rich man to be further exploiting those of a poorer background. At the end of the day, universities are pretty much privatised; therefore, they have autonomy to take on whom they want to.

Also, universities should be accepting students based on their academic ability, rather than social class or ethnic origin. I hate all this equal opportunities bullshit that the government attempt to promote. It’s a whole load of bullocks as far as I’m concerned, because you know that institutions get more money and publicity taking on ethnic minorities and lower financially privileged people.

Yes, it is easier in this country to live; I’m not going to lie. There is a lot available to you that more than likely wouldn’t get in a third world country. However, I’m telling you now; the divide is rising between the haves and have-nots. If you’re unfortunate to be from a lower social background, you’re pretty much fucked. Do a Heathcliff and attempt to raise up the social ladder, but change it, don’t conform to it. I’m becoming a total Marxist when it comes to politics now.

Abortion. Is it right?

2011-02-25T06:27:00.000-08:00

It’s a worldwide dilemma. The dominant theistic/pro-life approach is that it is wrong, as is the abolition of life. I personally believe that it can be right or wrong, depending on people’s reasoning/decision to have an abortion. I mean, at the end of the day, women can do whatever they wish; it is their body to decide.

Objectively, I feel that abortion is wrong if a female gets pregnant out of stupidity. I don’t think that the baby should have to pay for her mistake, at the end of the day; she knew what she was risking when she had sex. Also, she has to deal with the consequences for not being careful. Saying that, I also am on a scale, because is it fair for the child to be brought up by a person that isn’t ready to have kids?

I also believe, however, that if someone got raped and got pregnant as a result of it, I would understand their decision to have an abortion.

As I have never been pregnant, I have to admit there is no way that I can give an adamant decision on abortion. I do believe that you have to be in that particular situation in order to give a validated opinion. If I got pregnant now, I honestly couldn’t tell you what I’d do. I do think that I would consider abortion, but that’s because I would worry about the reactions of my parents. But I also know that if I did that, I would feel so guilty for it. Therefore, I probably would have the baby.

Skin Lightening. Is it really necessary?

2011-02-18T01:19:00.000-08:00

I understand why people want to do skin lightening, just like any plastic surgery or any other force to change their appearance in any shape or form. But I don’t agree with it. The reason for this is that I believe that people take it to another level. My hairdresser and her boyfriend use skin bleach, and their excuse is that it ‘evens out their skin tone.’ They’re always commenting on how nice my light skin is (I’m naturally light-skinned).

Blogger Amir Shaw, when describing Vybz Kartel’s skin lightening, which is completely grim by the way, which is why I haven’t posted the image on here, but here’s the link (http://repeatingislands.com/2011/01/20/jamaican-dancehall-star-vybz-kartel-bleached-skin/), Shaw says that is a ‘deeply rooted self-hatred that has permeated the black community for hundreds of years. White slave owners often created discord between dark and fair skinned slaves to minimize the chances of a slave revolt. As a result, that form of thinking was passed along through generations of black culture.’

I think skin lightening is horrific and a stupid thing for dark-skinned people to do. It goes against the natural order, and what would you say if you children ended up dark-skinned? Would you fill them with your own insecurities and make them bleach their skin as well?

One of the main problems is that there are not enough dark-skinned people positively portrayed in the media. Light-skinned/mixed-race black people are upheld as beautiful. If you look at the people that represent us as attractive, that win Miss America, Miss Grenada, Miss Jamaica, they are usually light skinned women mixed with other races, primarily white, and this is why they are considered ‘beautiful.’ Most political leaders of African origin also have Caucasian origins, which make them light-skinned. Being part Caucasian makes you beautiful, apparently.

I used to hate it when Beyoncé was bigged up for having a big bum and being beautiful; in my opinion, she is just average, tbh. Like she’s the first and only black woman to have a big arse! It makes me sick. Trust people to love Beyoncé, the lightest member of Destiny’s Child. KMT.

In India, all the big Bollywood stars are the light-skinned, European looking ones. Oriental people try to enlarge their eyes to make themselves more Caucasian. I know a Chinese girl who bleaches her hair blonde and wears blue contact lenses, which is her attempt to look more beautiful/European. SMH! Haven’t you seen Lucy Liu? She is so hot and she doesn’t need to be European to be beautiful.

One of the few women that represent dark-skinned women as gorgeous is Naomi Campbell, Emanuela de Paula and Iman. One of the few men are Isaiah Washington, Blair Underwood and Denzel Washington. As a result, there are not enough dark skinned role models for people to aspire to. Since there is an influx of light-skinned people popularised in the media, therefore it is viewed as beautiful to be whiter. Take the boyband JLS. The two members that are upheld (and the only ones to have a Wikipedia page) are Marvin Humes and Aston Merrygold, the two mixed-race, light-skinned ones.

Not that I’m dissing mixed race people; I’m mixed race myself, but I just despise that there is still a ‘white pride,’ even amongst brown people. When I was younger, I used to wish that I were a little bit lighter. I also used to believe that if I was whiter, that more men would be attracted to me. Which is bollocks, tbh. Like I’ve said before, if a person is judging you on your skin colour to decide whether or not to like/value you, then they are not worth your time. Don’t make yourself insecure because of the foolishness of another person.

I personally believe that everyone is beautiful in his or her own way; beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Also, there is beauty found in each shade of colour. There are dark-skinned people that I don’t find attractive, and there are also white people that I don’t find attractive. I also know that if that dark-skinned people that I don’t find attractive bleached their skin, it would not make them more attractive; it would in fact make them look worse. There is no one that looks attractive from skin bleaching. I was watching My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding the other day, and there was a white woman that had got an excessive spray tan which made her look burnt, and she looked completely unattractive. There’s a dark-skinned guy in my school, and I think that he is beautiful. He’s from Sudan and his skin tone is perfect. He doesn’t need to lighten his skin at all.

I admit, in the past, I used to make stupid and immature comments about how ‘blick’ someone was, which was well out of order and I am deeply apologetic for that. ‘Blick’ is usually used in a derogatory way, which was the way I used to use it. Being ‘blick’ usually is a reason for calling someone ugly.

People just need to accept themselves for what they look like, that is the one thing you have to submit to. Do people seriously want just to be liked for their artificial beauty rather than their natural beauty?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-1358119/Beyonce-Knowles-Why-I-believe-betraying-black-Asian-Women.html

CHECK THIS OUT

2011-02-15T06:44:00.000-08:00

http://www.zeitgeistthefilm.com/

Watch the first two. Prepare yourself.

It's long though, so set aside 4 hours :)

Boys and condoms

2011-02-12T02:58:00.000-08:00

What is it with boys and not wanting to wear condoms in casual relationships? The amount of nonsense that I have heard from boys’ mouths when I ask if they can wear a condom: ‘It takes away the pleasure,’ ‘It feels like a wet towel over my cock,’ and ‘I wanna feel flesh, bareback is better.’

Is it really logical to risk getting pregnant, getting an STD just for a moment’s pleasure? Seriously? Because I guarantee you this, it is very rare for boys to stick around willingly if any of those things occur.

Why can’t people think more responsibly? Not that I’m leaving girls out of this, since girls are more mature, they should know better. But when it comes to the guy that you really like that you’re about to drop your knickers for, the battle is between MATURITY vs. ‘LOVE,’ hormones, being horny, and ‘I want him to like me’ SMH. Trust me, if your man really liked you, he would respect your wishes, and grow to respect you and your body. The ‘lash and dash,’ is not particularly the best experience in the world, especially when naturally, as a female, you plan your whole future automatically when you meet someone that you may think is ‘the one.’

Most boys are just yearning to ‘hit that,’ that's it, and you need to remember that, and that is why you need to think responsibly, and USE A CONDOM!

I don’t care much for this religious b******t about preventing life and what not, because let’s face it, the majority of people are having pre-marital sex for the fun of it, not necessarily to deal with the undeniable consequences of having a kid or an STD.

Think before you f***. :)

Should that Christian couple that owned the B&B be punished for turning away that gay couple?

2011-01-31T03:39:00.000-08:00

Yes.

I decided to talk about this this week because it was an issue raised on The Big Questions on BBC 1 last Sunday morning. Really interesting and thought provoking show – I highly recommend watching it.

I believe that they should be punished, initially because as they are providing a public service, therefore they have an obligation to permit their B&B to people from all walks of life, whether gay, straight, etc. At the end of the day, if the couple was still giving them p, why moan? Also, the B&B should have made it clear from the onset (once the couple had made the booking) that they weren’t accepting gay couples to share a double bed, instead of allowing them to turn up and then turn them away upon appearance.

I’m not saying that they are not entitled to their opinion, at all. They are completely justified about having a firm belief system. I personally don’t agree with their beliefs, but I am entitled to my beliefs just as they are entitled to theirs. But don’t impose your belief on others and make others suffer for the sake of your beliefs. They may think they’re being semi-martyrs but no, because they are not loving thy neighbour.

If that couple reject gays, surely they would reject customers of another faith, because they don’t coincide with what they believe in. They would probably have to ask every single customer if they had ever stolen anything in their lives and if so, reject them because being a thief is condemned in the Bible. The list goes on and on.

As Jesus said, ‘He who is without sin cast the first stone.’

Greed, hypocrisy, injustice and selfishness

2011-01-19T03:51:00.000-08:00

I am currently a Haringey resident (more of my identity revealed) ;), and the borough constantly attempts to uphold its status as ‘Clean Haringey’ and has numerous general waste and recycling bins around. Every household has three bins: one for food, one for rubbish and one for recycling. I do like this system as it is very efficient and environmentally friendly. What I don’t like is that Haringey continuously indoctrinates its residents the importance of recycling HOWEVER fails to do this in its own institutions. Tottenham Hotspur is one of the perfect examples of where Haringey needs to step up to the plate and monitor recycling. I work as a barista at Tottenham games occasionally; not the greatest job in the world but it makes the necessary p for a youngster who is on the grind. At the end of each game, there is always a lot of food left over that is unsold, mainly hot food, such as burgers, sausage rolls and chips. Whatever we the staff cannot eat gets chucked away. I find this extremely shocking, as there are so many homeless people who go hungry in the UK, there is all that food that could be donated to them, yet it isn't! It’s preposterous how this is allowed, and I can’t comprehend why. Surely throwing away food is the same as giving it away, so it’s not like they would lose money for donating it. I’m sure that the catering companies which represent Tottenham Hotspur get the food at a discounted price anyway since they are buying it up wholesale, therefore why the petty greediness?

I also have to add that the job that I do pays minimum wage and the workers only get paid for four hours worth of work, so it’s not like these companies are losing money further. It’s complete injustice.

Secondly, I have to attack good ol’ PRIMARK. Now, I admit, I do shop there for some of my gear, as I’m not exactly rich. However, it recently came to my attention that Primark in Wood Green (and I'm sure nationwide) SHRED unsold clothes. WTF? This again, is completely unfair. The North London Hospice (where I also used to volunteer) in Wood Green complained in the local newspaper that this was unfair because of the lack of donated clothes that they get and that they need all the help that they can get. Are you seriously trying to tell me that Primark, a store which has extreme popularity cannot donate the unsold clothes to charity stores or homeless shelters? SMH! Primark make £34 million a year. Are they really going to worry bankruptcy, especially as they gain so many customers anyway as the recession causes people to shop there.

I just don't get all this evil and why people don't seem to have a conscience. Can someone please explain it to me?

Writer's Block

2011-01-19T03:32:00.000-08:00

As of late I have had the worst writer's block which is why I have been absent from Blogger. But it does seem absence makes the heart grow fonder because I have gained feedback for my blog as well as some followers! :)

Thanks so much guys and I will be posting later this week so hopefully my blockade is over for a while :D

Government apparently have no money so they make cuts by raising uni fees, but still have £450 million to spend on a new football stadium

2010-11-26T07:42:00.000-08:00

Yeah, that makes sense. Raise university fees to £9,000 per year to relieve cuts, yet the British government don’t mind giving £450 million away to Tottenham Hotspur for a brand new stadium. Don’t get me wrong. Tottenham are stepping up now. I don’t support them but I work at their stadium, and it does need upgrading. However, in this economic climate, I don’t think that they should do around this time. I feel that it’s unfair that the government have money to give to unnecessary funding and have the nerve to tell us that they are going to raise university fees. Life is just going to end up how it was before – all the poor people getting PARRED OUT.

It’s fine if your parents did well for you and everything so you can afford to be a Tory since you have money, but at least empathise with people who aren’t rich. I heard one girl say that she doesn’t care about the rise in university fees because her parents are rich enough to afford it. That’s incredibly selfish and I wish people would just be more considerate for others.

But back to the point. Uni fees are going to be ridiculously high and it’s not right. Young people didn’t go to school for fourteen or more years for that. We didn’t listen to the crap from our teachers, parents and the media that ‘uni is the only way that you will succeed,’ just for that. The government is even talking about rising the age for compulsory education to 18. Then surely keep the uni fees the same?

For that amount of money, is it even worth going to uni? Being in debt all your life, and plus interest? Also, not only do you have to pay for tuition fees, you have to pay for accommodation, lifestyle in general etc.

Even though it may not affect me as I’m going to uni next year, I am as much angered as everyone else. I think that everyone, no matter what class you are, should have the opportunity to go to university.

However, these protests that are happening are getting out of hand, I admit that, and it sounds very clichéd, but all this violence is not going to help. It’s just going to make us look bad and the government will continue to not to take us seriously. But don’t give up!!!!!

Why I think that British black children do not do well in schools

2010-09-03T15:44:00.000-07:00

There has been a lot of debate about why black children do not progress well at school, in contrast to their peers. I have not done a lot of research for this particular post, since here I just want to voice my own opinions. But from what I have heard word of mouth and from the news, I also want to comment on those thoughts too.

First of all, I just really want to draw a contrast. When this topic is discussed, the children are classified as black. Under that umbrella includes both children of African heritage and children of African ancestry from the Americas (Afro-Caribbean, Afro-Brazilian, etc). Now, from my experience, I believe that it is mainly those of African ancestry from the Americas that do not do as well, compared to their African counterparts, if you understand what I’m saying. And now it is proper long to keep writing ‘African ancestry from the Americas,’ and I don’t want to say African-American, since that classifies black people from the U.S., rather than the black people from the other Americas. Therefore, I am just going to resort to the term Afro-Caribbean, since they are the dominant black people in the UK.

Back to what I was saying about Afro-Caribbean children not doing as well as their African counterparts, I believe very strongly that that is true. Obviously in not all cases, I myself have met people of my age group who are Afro-Caribbean and they have done exceptionally well at school. One of the girls from my old school, she is from Trinidad and Tobago, and she got all As and A*s at GCSE, and she got 5 As at A-Level. She is ridiculously smart, I know, and she is one of the loveliest people that you will ever meet. But (to my despair), she is also part East Indian, which may partially explain the cleverness.

But, back to the point, it seems that the majority of Afro-Caribbean are not doing well in school compared to everybody else. Why?

Well, I personally believe that it is down to slavery. DON’T raise your eyebrows, I’d like to think that I am not being horrifically clichéd. I think that from slavery, the descendants were so psychologically damaged and conditioned in such a way that they subconsciously feel that they can never really aspire to be great, to be successful and to do well. Being constantly put down, being told that you’re not a person, just a thing, it’s been passed down and it lingers. It takes a lot of perseverance and belief in oneself to be able to rise above it.

But yeah, that’s the reason why I think that Afro-Caribbean children don’t do as well as school compared to their African peers; the African peers never really had historically as much recent (oxymoron) psychological damage as Afro-Caribbean’s, through their ancestry.

I really hope that black children who don’t do well in school try to use their heritage as an excuse though. It is a reason, but it shouldn’t be an obstacle. If anything, you should try to rise above that and kill that stereotype.

Me personally, I am half-Jamaican and half-Ghanaian, so I see both sides of the black spectrum. I’d like to think that I did okayish at school – I got good grades in GCSE and I am doing A-Levels. I wish that I did work a lot harder though, but I was going through a lot of stuff that made me decline in my work. But I do tend to get into the lazy mode, which is associated more with my Jamaican side, I admit. But I refuse to let my heritage stop me from working to my potential, and I will work for ME. If I do well and it inspires my other Afro-Caribbean peers, then I am glad for that.

I just hope that black British children will improve education-wise tbh, and I have yet to read that book that is depicted in the photo in the beginning.

Hey :/

2010-08-29T10:11:00.001-07:00

Sorry I haven't been around for a couple of weeks; it seems that my Internet service wasn't supporting Blogger but it's okay, I'm fine, and now I'm back.

I will go back to posting blogs religiously on Fridays.

Over and out.

Why People Bitch...

2010-07-29T16:03:00.000-07:00

There are many reasons that I believe that people bitch. In this blog, I have referred to people, but I am referring to mainly girls in this blog post, since females are my speciality (sorry, guys – it’s just that you don’t really bitch as much as girls do, and if you do, it’s very likely that you’re probably gay). Me, also, admittedly, am a perpetrator of bitching, so from analysing myself as well as others I am able to have an opinion.

One of the reasons that I believe that girls bitch, is because it is usually because they have their own insecurities, which underlie their motivations to bitch. I am pissed right at this moment because I lost a day today babysitting (for free), which meant I was unable to go out today and I just got my first negative feedback on eBay, which has decreased my feedback to 98%, which has angered me because the buyer should have been happy that he got a pair of Levi 501s for £2.50 and start whining because of a little stain, when the cheapest pair on eBay is over a tenner. Prick. So, to make myself feel better, it will help to bitch about someone else, another person who seems worse off than me. I believe that when you get joys out of another’s downfall helps them to feel better about your own problems, or even just to forget about it a little. I think that women do it a lot because they are highly emotional compared to dudes. Bitching for a girl is like punching in walls for a guy; it gives them the release they crave and helps them to calm down.

I believe that people also bitch because they are jealous of the person that they are bitching about. My mum tells me that, and I believe that it's true, because even personally, I have done it for that very reason. I sometimes can get so insecure that I compare myself to others, and when it seems like someone’s life is better than mine, I find that bitching helps me to feel a little better about my own life.

I find that I bitch to my highest degree when I’m with others. When you associate yourself with people who bitch a lot, it tends to rapidly become part of your nature too. On my own, or when I’m surrounding myself with a lot more secure and positive people, then I tend not to bitch as much, and I find that is when I am at my happiest. I have this strong guilt thing about me; when I bitch I tend to feel really bad about it and send a silent apology to the victim – I even find myself apologising to God sometimes for being such a BITCH. It’s a trait of mine that I really despise, and I am actively trying to change, but it is a dominant part of me, so it is quite difficult. When I was younger, I found I used to bitch a lot just so that I would fit in with the crowd, which does sound incredibly clichéd; but it’s the gospel truth.

I know a girl, my age, who ended up becoming part of the ‘popular’ crowd by being a snitch; she basically told the girls in the ‘popular’ crowd things that other girls said about them just to gain access and approval as a member.

Bitching may feel good initially for you, but it is obviously not the best thing if the other person finds out about it. I have been the victim countless times of bitching, but I often see it as perhaps karma for doing it to others. To be the victim, you feel that you are the centre of attention, everyone is looking at you and judging you, and that is a horrible feeling. It helps to increase your insecurities as well. The bitcher and the bitchee; two very INSECURE BEINGS! How lovely.

You can lose friends over bitching, which is not worth it. People lose their trust in you because they fear that if they tell you anything, the whole world will know about it. Bitching is not worth that, trust me.

But it is okay to bitch, if someone has parred you out and stabbed you in the back. That is perfectly justifiable. The bitchee deserves it. It helps you to feel better. But then after the bitching, you take time to think about…REVENGE. LOL. I joke. No, take time to chill, relax and think rationally about the situation.

It’s so easy for me to sit in my swivel chair and talk about bitching, but it’s a completely different thing to put my words into practice, even for myself. I’m constantly trying to make myself a better person, believe me, but it’s pretty damn hard. It takes time and effort and a lot of work. But the way of beginning to get on the path of BETTERHOOD is to admit your faults, your wrongs and weaknesses and try to find solutions to them, and how you can be better.

My Opinions On Religion

2010-07-22T16:01:00.000-07:00

This week, I want to discuss religion. I hinted briefly at it a couple of weeks ago with my blog about homosexuals. Firstly, I would like to establish that I am not a Christian. I was never baptized into anything. I guess I believe the traditional Christian doctrines in the Bible, and I am a theist, but unsure about a lot of things, and a main thing with me, is the problem with evil and the issue of homosexuality. What I just do not comprehend is that why is there so much evil and why there is such a large degree of it, especially if it is not reflective of God. If really so, then why is it there and how did it come to be so, if God is so good? Also, if homosexuality is so bad, as the Bible apparently claims, then why are there gay people? Explain someone?

So, what’s the deal with religion? Well, it was used as a key source of power for the Holy Roman Empire and still used heavily by Islamic states. If you are a prime minister of the United Kingdom you cannot be a Catholic, you must be an Anglican, and if you are President of the United States, you must be a Christian. George Bush used religion as an excuse to why he declared war in the Middle East, the Crusades, Spanish Inquisition, and so many more, all in the name of religion. Religion is used to explain why an adulteress is stoned to death in Iran, why a woman cannot wear trousers in Saudi Arabia.

Honestly, I don’t really care about religion for myself, since I am quite a liberal person and I am quite open-minded. I respect religious people, don’t get me wrong. I feel that someone who is steadfast in their faith, no matter what trials and tribulations that they face, is really honourable and admirable. Likewise, I admire an atheist who has good reasons for their beliefs. I personally do not think it’s right to dismiss the idea of God altogether, since I think that how can it be proved that there is no God, so I believe that it’s safer to be agnostic. But then you get the argument, how can you prove that there is a God, and then everything becomes drawn out and complicated. I also believe that if a person should only decide to become an atheist if they have experienced enough of life to come to that conclusion. I remember while I was at secondary school, I noticed that a lot of the white people that I hung out with identified themselves as atheist; usually because they didn’t come from a religious background and because God couldn’t be proved, etc. See I don’t believe that that is right; agnostic is a better choice. You can’t be a hypocrite. Even though it is easier said than done, you really have to watch out for that. I have seen religious people who are completely hypocritical, yet they will still discriminate against others, for example a Christian kleptomaniac that condemns gays. I’m sorry, but at least the gay is honest with himself and NOT A HYPOCRITE!

I don’t respect religious people who try to impose their religious beliefs on others, especially when they are not interested. I also don’t like it when people criticise others for their beliefs. Even if you don’t agree, just accept it, and just be steadfast in your own beliefs. I likewise don’t like it when atheists criticise religious people.

I was brought under influence from Jehovah’s Witnesses’ when I was younger, from the age of seven or eight, I can’t quite remember. I wasn’t officially a Jehovah’s Witness; I only studied the Bible with them. My dad was one (before he was a Catholic), before I was born, but he was ‘disfellowshipped,’ as they call it. Even though he did not want anything to do with them after, he still believed them to teach the Bible in the right way so he wanted me to be drawn under their influence. To be quite honest, I would have much preferred to be Catholic – it would have been a lot more accepted. I quit going to Kingdom Halls and studying the Bible when I was fourteen. I wanted to quit earlier than that, since I found it extremely tedious as well as embarrassing (explaining to people that you associated with them). I went because my dad made me, but I hated it. Sundays felt like a waste of my life; two and a half hours were the longest hours ever. I admit, there were times that I did enjoy it; sometimes the ‘WatchTower’ and ‘Awake!’ articles could be quite interesting. But I was always scared to raise my hand for those ‘WatchTower,’ talks; even just thinking about it now makes me blush. They are good people, those Jehovah’s Witnesses, and I do respect them even though I don’t really talk to any of them anymore. I was young and immature back then to handle the pressures from outside of associating with Jehovah’s Witnesses.

But I couldn’t adhere to their beliefs. It was bad enough that they didn’t celebrate Christmas or birthdays; as a young person, that was just weird, especially as my mother upheld those traditions. I love birthdays and Christmas; I don’t really give a toss really about the meaning behind them, come on, presents, party, lots of food and Eastenders special. I used to have instances where I would completely conceal the Jehovah’s Witnesses opinion and celebrate those things regardless, but then I would have little epiphanies and want to stand up against it. I remember in Year 6 I had one of those little epiphanies and did a presentation on them. I brought my Bible to school and everything. I sort of recoil when I think of that. I also told people at my secondary school when I was in Year 7 and 8 that I studied with them; which I used to regret because people think that you’re a freak. You know how it is when you are young; you just want to be accepted. There was one other girl in my class that was, and she was quite a strong-willed person, so I tried to stick with her but it didn’t really work.

I respect them and all, but Jehovah’s Witnesses isn’t really for me. I don’t like the way that they shun out the world and are reserved to themselves even though ironically their purpose is to go out and convert the world. I think they are quite strict; if I stayed with them I don’t think I would feel as liberated as I do now. Also, what really didn’t help me was that I had no one to really relate to in the Kingdom Hall. There were not many young people, and the ones that were there were either home-schooled or left. When I finally made a decision to leave I was relieved, I felt at peace, since I felt that it was a chore rather than a choice.

In a sense, I’m glad that I was under their influence, because they did teach me about the Bible and helped me to establish at least a partial belief in God. But I also disliked how the other young people were brought up. I mentioned before that a lot of them were home schooled, I think that that is not right because how are they going to learn about other people in the ‘world,’ the very same people that they are meant to preach to and attempt to convert. You need to gain an understanding of them before you just go to them. I also didn’t like the way that the Jehovah’s Witnesses shunned the outside world – like I said before, how can you do that if you have to preach to people that are in that outside world. You can’t just pick and choose.

Read: http://www.exjehovahswitness.net/about

If I got married, and I had to convert, it would really depend on what religion that it was. I wouldn’t mind becoming a Buddhist, because their beliefs are quite liberal. I would convert to Judaism and Catholicism, because I do believe in the Judaeo-Christian God, and I do like those belief systems.

Blackberrys GRRRR

2010-07-15T16:49:00.000-07:00

BlackBerrys, BlackBerrys, BlackBerrys. Hmm. What do I say, apart from that I hate them, yep I’m a hater! I honestly believe, that they are the second essential item to a black girl alongside weave (see previous post). But it’s not just a black girl thing. It seems that everyone is getting one; it’s the new Pokemon cards. What I want to understand is why? Why is everyone jumping on the BlackBerry bandwagon?

Fair dos, yeah, that it is a useful phone, but come on, it’s a BUSINESS phone. I don’t think a ten-year-old girl runs a business, so why does she need a big old BlackBerry. Sorry, at that age, I didn’t even have a phone, and if I did, it would be some cheap £5 phone – pay as you go (like my mother would really buy me a contract at TEN).

I feel that BlackBerrys are just another part of society where people are becoming increasingly more materialistic. I mean, you see someone with a Blackberry and you automatically assume that they are wealthy and sophisticated. The amounts of money people spend on a contract for a BlackBerry – not including VAT remember – I think that they are absolutely mad. Just for a phone that does virtually the same thing as my C905, both can call and text, both are a video/digital camera (my C905 is a better camera), both can go on the Internet via the network or Wi-Fi, etc. The only thing that my C905 cannot do is BlackBerry Messenger, but so what, who wants to be an anti-social fool who is glued to their phone 24-7 and 99.9% of the time are not even paying for it; their parents are. People seriously need to start taking responsibility for themselves; life really isn’t all ha-ha-hee-hee. It’s all right for some people who have parents with a good job and can finance everything that they want to do, but I believe that children need to be taught about looking after themselves rather than just relying on Daddy’s credit card.

I respect the person who pays for their own BlackBerry and is using it for useful things such as work, rather than purely recreational activities. Yeah, I know that people can do whatever they want and blah, blah, blah. But this is my personal opinion and the reason for my vendetta against BlackBerrys. I am content with my Sony Ericsson; it does the job and it ultimately means that I am not jumping on any bandwagon and it makes me feel individual.

Homosexuals and Homophobia

2010-07-09T08:16:00.000-07:00

This week, I want to discuss gay people and animosity towards them. First of all, I am not homophobic, if anything, I am a homophile. I go to gay bars with my friends, I associate with them, I am a straight up FAG HAG. I was at London Gay Pride, if you saw me. I even think that I am a bit bisexual too, but I’m not completely sure. Okay, then. Bi-curious!

I’d like to say the following, since it always comes up when discussing homosexuals; I am a theist. I do believe in a Christian God, but I am not a Christian. I have never been baptized, christened, etc, but I did have a lot of Christian influence from my family and I did study the Bible with Jehovah’s Witnesses when I was younger for a number of years. I believe in God, but there are a lot of things about the world that make me judge God’s apparent nature, in particular his benevolence, his omnipotence, and his omniscience (I do theology, that’s why I use big words). The Bible seems to slate gays to the max. One of the reasons why Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed because of homosexuality sex and the Bible says stuff like man should not sleep with man, and the like. Now this confuses me. Fair enough that God condemns it, he is allowed to have his opinion, and he created us, after all. But what I just don’t understand, is if it is so bad to be gay, why are there gays in the first place?

I don’t get it. I certainly don’t believe that homosexuality is a choice, either. That is a load of rubbish. If it was a choice, I am indignant that no one would want to be gay. Seriously, who would want to be hated tremendously, at risk of murder and other abominable discriminations? I don’t remember apparently ‘deciding’ to be straight. All I remember is looking at a guy and thinking, ‘he’s cute,’ not ‘oh, because everyone else seems to like the opposite sex, so should I, I am going to like that boy because it is the norm.’ It was just some weird feeling inside of me that said ‘that boy is cute.’ How can sexuality be passed of as a choice like deciding to eat a doughnut? I have someone very close to me who is a lesbian, and trust me, if it really was a choice they would have chosen the ‘straight’ road a long time ago. I feel that those people that say that homosexuality is a choice; they don’t explicitly know any gays. Also, I think that those who are homophobic don’t really hate them; I think that they just have a phobia of them, as the name suggests. The animosity arises from the fear of what is not considered as ‘normal.’

In my old school, there were some girls that had come out as bi-sexual, but they weren’t ostracized severely; they were just avoided and bitched about. The other girls were just freaked out in this sense that it was like something that was just plain weird to them.

Furthermore, I argue, that if homosexuality really is so wrong, are you really telling me that it is alongside other taboos along with paedophilia, rape, etc. I’m sorry, but I’d rather my child tell me that he/her is gay than if they were a murderer or a rapist. I watched this film the other day, Two Mothers for Zachary, which was about this lesbian mother, whose own mother had got the courts to allow her to get custody of the lesbian’s son, just because homosexuality was extremely frowned upon in that particular U.S. State. What was even more appalling was that the lesbian mother’s boyfriend had raped the lesbian on numerous occasions. This is a TRUE STORY by the way, and it was a long time ago. So, they would rather a child be brought up amongst a RAPIST than a lesbian? Are you kidding me? It’s also hilarious that America is so messed up, the disgusting things that go on there, men raping babies, fathers burning their children to death, women having sexual relations with their nephews, and people want to put homosexuals up on that list. It’s not the gays you hear doing these disgraceful acts (rule out Catholic priests who rape children, they are not human).

I can’t stand resentment towards gays, I think that it is totally out of order and an abomination in itself. You’ll accept a repentant murderer, but not a gay? Okay, that makes sense (sarcasm). I know someone that attempted to turn a woman straight, and she accepted, which I think is totally sad. That woman is not happy now, her life has not turned out how she would have wanted to, and I partially blame the man for thinking that he can play God and the woman for being stupid enough to go through with it, even though just being honest with herself would have been better for her in the long run. Accept yourself for who you are and then you can be strong. If people are prejudice towards you because of your sexuality; then are they really worth your time and effort? If they really cared about you, they would accept you no matter what, even if they do have difficulty initially.

Jamaica has one of the highest crime rates against homosexuals in the world, which I am really angry about. I’m half-Jamaican, and that is just another thing that brings our culture down. Also, if you hate someone, surely you don’t want to have anything to do with them. The lengths that some Jamaicans go to prolong their hatred against gays, I just don’t understand it. Just leave them alone, for goodness sake. I mean, come on, Mr. Evil. I like a couple of his songs, but the fact that he took the time to write a song about gays, it seriously makes me consider whether he is gay himself.
I also hate it when people say things like, ‘I would be scared if my friend came out in case they had a crush on me.’ I think that’s really unfair; surely that’s like having a friend of the opposite sex having a crush on you. I think that that is just an excuse to cover the real feeling that a friend coming out gay would really just freak them out. If a girl had a crush on me, I’d be flattered; but I’d just explain to her calmly that I didn’t feel the same way, just like I would with a guy. Come on, if you’re attracting both the sexes, it means that you’re hot! But on a serious not, if my friend (male or female), came out to me then I would provide her/him with all the support that I could, because they need it so much because of all the flak that they get from ‘straight’ people.

Love, Sex and Relationshops

2010-07-01T16:09:00.001-07:00

I have decided to talk about love, sex and relationships this week because, as I’m sure you’ll agree, they are very important topics in life. I admit that I have been quite open here, but since you don’t my identity, I feel safe behind my computer screen.

Last year, I was in love for the first time. Even though our relationship only lasted a few months, I became much attached to him and was heartbroken when he dumped me. I hated love then, because it turned me in some sort of recluse, a hermit, because I couldn’t really talk to people about how I was feeling and I was deeply hurt. It was an awful, awful feeling, even worse than not passing my exams last year, and I really want to avoid feeling that way again.

My ex used to say that life was all about the experience, and it really is. That experience with him taught me a lot about love and relationships, and now I think I have a better jist of them so as to avoid getting my heart broken again. The mistake that I made was that I was very uncommunicative with my boyfriend; not that we didn’t speak, but that when it came to deep, and emotional things, I never really wanted to talk about it. I was too scared to, scared that he may judge me, scared that it may come out wrong, etc. He would look me in the eye and be expecting me to say all these things and I couldn’t say it. It was all in my head, spinning round and round what I wanted to say but I just couldn’t get them out verbally. I felt so stupid, it’s not like he can read my mind. I really wanted to tell him, though, especially when it looked like that it may jeopardize our relationship if I didn’t. But in order to tell him things, I wanted it to come out right, I wanted it to come out freely, without all the pressure that I’m just telling him to make him leave me alone, rather than having a genuine feeling to talk to him. Also, I did something really stupid that really pissed him off. I was at some girl’s party and I kissed another boy. He thinks I did it to spite him (when I told him), but it really weren’t spite. It was because of my stupid never-ending desire to please people, and I felt bad because the guy was really nice and he did like me, and I felt sorry for him so as a result I kissed him. I felt so stupid about it afterwards, and I knew that I would have to tell my boyfriend. I admit that I am young, so try not to judge me so harshly, but I was stupid.

But that fully confirmed for him that I was too immature to date, so end of relationship. I also didn’t really explain to him properly why I kissed that boy, and I wish that I did. We don’t talk now, because it hurt me too much to have any contact with him, but I wish that we did because I hate having vendettas with people.

What I’m really trying to get at is, is that I believe that it was the way that I was brought up which is why I didn’t approach our relationship in the right way. I feel that if, like my ex, came from a strong family, and had parents who were in love and had a positive relationship, I would have been fine (even though this is not always the case). I come from a really dysfunctional family, and it really affected me growing up. It still continues to, as I still live at home. But I know what I want out of my life now, through my harsh experiences, and I strive to be better.

Now, when I next get into a relationship, I am going to make sure that I am straight with the guy; I want to take things slow, which I think is the best way for a successful relationship. I believe that when you take the time to get to know each other, it develops the friendship as well as the romance. Sex is not on the table until I think it is, since I feel that a lot of boys are too immature when it comes to sex. I want to feel that it is perfect time to do it.

What I really want is to have a relationship with a guy, and to be honest and assertive in the relationship. Who doesn’t want to have the perfect relationship? The real problem with growing up in a dysfunctional family is that it can mess you up so bad that you are unaware of how to deal with your own relationships in the right way, not just with friends, but with other people as well. The problem that I have is that I was not really made aware of what a loving, caring relationship was like with my parents, so I didn’t really have a clear model of how to base my own relationships. I feel that people just don’t appreciate what a simple two-parent relationship can do to benefit your life. It doesn’t even have to be your biological parents. Stability is what children need to grow up effectively. To even have a one really strong parent can also benefit a child. I really wish that I had that in my life; I wish that my mother was a stronger person, because that would have helped me to be also strong.

Another way is that a negative experience that you have seen with your parents can make you a vulnerable person. To be this way is not good, because people are inclined to use you because they recognise your weaknesses and use it to their advantage and against you, especially when it does come to relationships. I was watching this show called Peckham Finishing School on BBC Three the other day, and one girl was saying that she used to feel that the only way that she could get someone to love her was to have sex with them, so as a result, was used by men and became promiscuous. She had had a hard life growing up; she had grown up in care and had suffered a negative experience. Also, these vulnerable girls are at such danger from boys who use them, since these awful boys now exactly what words to say, how to get this girl right round their little finger, just to persuade them to perform sexual acts that they may be uncomfortable doing, just because they are in ‘love,’ as it were.

There are also stupid girls (I think that they’re stupid), who are from stable backgrounds, but are played by boys so obviously it is annoying to watch. There is one girl from my old school, she has been with her boyfriend for three years, yet this boy cheats on her all the time and she always forgives him. If that were me, that boy would be gone. But I say this now with the state of mind that is not locked down by love, if I was in love, I don’t know if I’d be singing a totally different tune.

This can also be true for girls towards boys. I know one girl (I really don’t like her), she is very promiscuous and she is only fifteen years old (they’re getting younger), and she is going out with this boy that I know, who is nineteen (yes, he should know better than to go out with a younger). This boy, before he met her, was a virgin and he is sensitive and vulnerable. He lost his virginity to her, and she has the audacity to cheat on him numerous times, even with people that he knows, and she even makes fun of him (that he has a small penis and the like). They keep breaking up, and getting back together, in other words, he realises that she is playing him for a fool, yet he is in too deep to get out. He is in love with her (stupidly), because I think that because he lost his virginity to her, she has acquired some sort of high status to him, yet to her, he is just a booty call. When she is lonely and bored, she goes back to him. The worst thing about is, is that as she is a younger, she is also this type of person, horrid enough to threaten him with the law, since he is an adult and she is not yet the age of consent. If I were him, I’d dump the wench, and lay very low for a while.

This comes into another thing about sex. I personally feel that sex is very special and you should have sex with a person that you honestly care about and love to a large extent. I lost my virginity to my ex and I have no regrets, because I know that I was in love so it felt right. I try not to judge other people’s attitude’s to sex though. I do know some girls that have a genuine interest to just sleep around. I think that’s wrong, but that’s just me, people can do whatever they want.

When it comes to cheating, I feel that it really all depends on the circumstances. If my boyfriend cheated on me by kissing a random girl, and it was a drunken thing or for certain reasons like mine, I would probably forgive him, because I can relate to him, and I realise that we all make mistakes. I would also be insistent that he didn’t do it again, because I also realise that if you start seeming like you permit it, the person will carry on making these ‘mistakes.’ If my man cheated on me by kissing a girl he knew, as in they were friends, then I would be deeply concerned. This is because there are feelings between the friend and my man already, listen to Usher’s ‘U Make Me Wanna,’ if you want to know what I mean. I may seriously consider leaving him. Also, if it was one of my friends, that is a total no-go.

Overall, I guess I have a quite a conventional attitude towards love, relationships and sex, when it comes to my own ventures; since I would prefer that my relationship would be monogamous and to be based on true love. Yes I believe in true love!

He Left Me For a White Girl!!!

2010-06-25T00:57:00.000-07:00

Now, I know that you are probably thinking that this is going to be another blog from another black girl about race, but this topic is actually important to me.

But this is important to me, because a couple of months ago, I met this really good-looking, nice black guy, and we did hit it off (I thought so anyway), but then he told me that he usually goes for white girls! SNM. Also, Tiger Woods has been known to only date white women, most black British footballers date white women, and even Lenny Henry has been known for his attraction for blonde women. Also, I’m sure you’ve heard about Slim Thug’s comments (

http://www.vibe.com/posts/slim-thug-black-women-need-stand-their-man-more) and listen to this black guy(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFa1tTf8PKA).

So, what do white girls, or should I say Caucasian girls, have that other raced girls don’t? I have come up with a few theories; correct me if I’m wrong. One of them is that I think that people are bored with their own race, they are so used to being around their own race that they want to branch out and white seems like a safe bet. Another theory that I have, and is true, is that white girls are generally perceived to be nice people, easy to approach and as a result, easy to pull. Or, really or, this is just speculation, it is because black men have not had always the opportunity for a long time to date white women, so now they can, they abuse it!

Also, most mixed-race guys (those with a white mother, and a black father, especially in the UK) are more likely to go out with white women. I believe this is because they are attracted to women who remind them of their mother, since I also know mixed race guys with black mothers and white fathers, who are more attracted to black women who remind them of their mother. So perhaps it is just about conditioning then in society. But then again, this is not always the case, but I did say most.

The amount of times I have heard white girls saying that they only want to go out with black guys, not just because of a preference thing, but because of ‘you know what they say about black guys…’ LOL. But I guess that black guys don’t really care about that since they get to hit that so, who cares? Both parties are pleased.

Imagine, if you were a woman of colour, dated a guy of colour, and then he left you for a white woman, think of how you would feel. I would feel self-conscious initially. But I also believe that if he left me for a girl in general (of any race), that would make me self-conscious, and it is not a race thing, it’s more of a personal thing. I think that race is used as a front to cover up true feelings of other emotional failure in relationships.

When a black woman sees a black and white couple, I think that she sees her own failures in her relationship with a black guy (or many other reasons), and thus becomes resentful due to her jealousy of their happiness. I don’t think it’s so much a race thing with most people; it’s mainly down to their insecurities, and race is just emphasised so as to conceal those emotions.

I have become quite paranoid. I am attracted to all races, but every time I see an attractive guy on the street, I feel like they will not be attracted to me because I’m not white. There are two guys that I like now, one is black and one is mixed-race, and I am held back by that fear. But I also do believe that I am being silly, because one, I don’t know what kind of girls these guys like, and two, it is probably down to my own insecurities to why I feel that I don’t suit these guys (bear in mind I can only have one).

As I realise most of you will argue; it is just about love, and all that jazz. But I’m not talking about that. I’m more addressing the whole preference side, rather than anything deeper.
But I what I really despise, is men that say that they prefer white women, not because of just a preference thing, but because they have been put off by the antics of women of their own race. I think that’s completely unfair to fully rule out all women of a certain race just because of a few bad experiences.

I know that if a guy is judging you because of your race, then he is a fool and not worth your time. I also know that it is all about it’s what inside that counts, and blah blah blah. But it’s hard to be optimistic when you’ve been single for a while.

WEAVE @&!!!

2010-06-18T06:38:00.000-07:00

As I’m writing from a black girl’s perspective, I’m sure you didn’t see this one coming.

Call me a hater, call me jealous, and call me whatever you want, but I am allowed to have my own opinion. I can’t stand weave. Like the BlackBerry, it is becoming an ever-prominent accessory for black women, and it is becoming really irritating thing.

Lauryn Hill quotes in her album, the Miseducation of Lauryn Hill, ‘Look at where you be in hair weaves like Europeans.’ I honestly believe that. Weave is becoming slowly like a covering of what makes us African, not just our skin, but now our hair? Not that I’m against straightening it or anything like that, I do that myself, but I believe that we should embrace the originality of our hair as much as possible. I know that our hair does take long to grow and does seem to look nice with the full head weave, but when that Asian ass piece of hair starts to lift and your natural hair starts to explode/escape out of it, that’s not a good look girls! Or when the centre of it starts to lift so everyone can tell that you are obviously wearing a weave, that’s not the one!

I don’t mind tracks, some tracks can look really good, since it is mixed with your natural hair that is perhaps straightened, it looks so nice. But full head weave is a no-go. The first time that a friend did it, for a few days it looked fantastic, but after a week or so it ended up looking horrifically fake.

It also adds to their image as fake, fake nails, fake hair, fake eyelashes, lots of make up, tight clothes and high heels. This takes away the reality of life, can you imagine sleeping with a girl like that and waking up and seeing her without the weave, without the make up, and you’re left with a spotty girl with short hair and dandruff?

What I cannot stand is when two black girls are having beef, you can guarantee that one of them is gonna diss each other’s weave in some way or another. Or end up dragging it out. That’s forty quid gone down the toilet.

The amount of times I’ve been out, and I see some black women with the most terrible weave I have ever seen, and then I overhear black girls cussing her out, or even I, I admit it, have been with friends and dissing other black women with weave that we think looks bad.

For me personally, I wear hair extensions, and that’s because I would like my hair to grow past my shoulders, without the harshness of chemical straighteners that damage hair and the frequent needing to comb which also contributes to the breaking of the hair. I would never get a weave because if I was to straighten my hair, I want it to be all my hair and for people to love it because it is mine, not from some poor Asian woman.

I conclude that my animosity with weave is more of women that have it need to maintain it so it looks good.

HELLO!!!

2010-06-02T17:24:00.000-07:00

Hi. I'm London Girl and I wish to use this blog to express my feelings about the world in general. Right this second, I am watching Season 6 of Grey's Anatomy, and I am feeling going to bed after this. I just wanted to provide an opening for this blog, and to say HOLA.

Adios.